For a person who love the Ideas as much as I do, I sure do like things concrete. I've realized this recently, especially due to various conversations with a few of my friends. I love the ideas and concepts and talking about them, but there comes a point in time when they need to come from the sky and firmly plant themselves on the ground.
This is why I don't build castles in the air. I try to be realistic, and not set arbitrary standards for people in different situations. I love fairy tales, but they are so overrated. I could singlehandedly come up with probably a thousand+ ways to be pursued and wooed, fairy tales give additional fuel in this arena. However, one area they strongly lack in is the ending.
And they lived happily ever after.
How does that help a young girl (or woman of any age, or even man of any age) form a proper idea about matrimony? Yes, the courting (etc) stage(s) are very important, but they aren't the end, just the means. Unless there is something besides "happily ever after" to live for together you will live and search for "happily ever after" apart, elsewhere. This is part of our societal problem today. We are a fairy tale society. We live off of Hollywood. Their movies, their stars, their magazines, their models, their lies. And we swallow them hook, line, and sinker, by the time we realize what we've done we've already taken in so much junk it's hard to distinguish it from the truth.
I could come up with over a thousand ways of pursuit, but I realize that while I have goals and objectives for life together with my future husband, I cannot actually trace a path. If I were to wander in the fields of woo-ment I could come up with different ideas without anyone in particular in mind. However, once I start thinking big picture I cannot go that far because it is a journey and a new life.
I do not approve of my visits to the land of air-borne castles for I realize now more than ever that the stage of friendship prior to marriage is the foundation upon which the marriage is built. The foundation, the framework, the threshold, and everything else must be sacred. Must be firmly grounded on the Bible and in Christ and cannot be floating in air.
Again, this is part of our problem as a society. Foundations are not considered essential in marriages or in prior stages. Instead you look across the room and fall in love with someone, as in the soap operas. Then we are surprised when, like the soap operas, there is jealousy, bitterness, distrust, brokenness, rage, etc in our own lives.
May we all strive to build our castles, whether they take the form of a poor, humble shack, a true castle, or something in between, on the solid foundation of Christ, and not being tossed about in the air.
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